Abuse Hides in the Dark. Turn on Your Light.

Effects of Abuse


  • I'm angry because

    “What is going on inside your mind to trigger the emotion of anger? I know you have this answer.” ~Erin on When is it okay for me to be angry? I am angry because I am not getting what I want. But more than that, I’m getting the same old shit in new packaging. I’m

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  • Hellfire

    “…Jesus had been known to become angry when something was wrong. ” ~ (part of) Kathy’s comment to When is it okay for me to be angry? Yep. Jesus threw a down and out hissy fit in the temple. I have always found that story comforting. It goes to show that ANGER isn’t something to

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  • When Is It Okay for Me to Be Angry?

    When Is It Okay for Me to Be Angry?

    So when is it okay for me to be angry? How do I get rid of it, find a solution for it, or at least just FEEL it, righteous or not, and move on?

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  • Hurtful Words Tell You Who You Are Not

    Hurtful Words Tell You Who You Are Not

    You Define Who You Are My Mamaw (great-grandmother) said “Give ’em to me” via a psychic last summer. Mamaw was talking about the hurtful words I have absorbed and any hurtful words I may hear in the future. She said those words didn’t mean anything – they weren’t true, and the only person hanging on

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  • Subconscious Habits

    Elements of this stinking thinking are evident before marrying Will, but I somehow overcame them (at least partially if not entirely). Or maybe my parents didn’t direct me in any certain way so what I did to try to please them aligned more directly with what I wanted for myself. Will “directed” me. He, unlike…

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  • Marriage Counseling Does Not Help Abusive Relationships

    Marriage Counseling Does Not Help Abusive Relationships

    I want him to take responsibility for our problems as he expects me to do & expects as much of himself as he expects of me. I want equality in our marriage. However, I tend to agree with Kera who commented, “His response to your marriage counseling hardly seemed like he’s going to become a…

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  • Anger Management

    I’m finding myself in need of anger management skills. Last night, while watching a documentary about the Army Rangers, my husband became horribly upset at the fact there was a woman psychologist present at the 2-week initial Ranger training program. I don’t know if it was because she was a woman or because she was

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  • Fragments

    Fragments

    I cannot afford to assume that the goodness will continue. When I go to cook dinner, I can take a minute to relish in the previous moment, think that something good may have happened, BUT if I assume the next time I see Will’s face that he will be glad to see me, smiling at…

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  • Cryptogram

    Okay, let’s do something a little different. I’m not going to tell you what this conversation was about. Instead, I’m going to share what I wrote down, what I heard him say verbatim, and let you fill in the blanks. Gullible Sucker Don’t take it personal Don’t get this twisted Unbelievable That’s (how he talks

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  • Loveseat

    There have been no more fights between Will and I. We aren’t fighting. We have had a couple of discussions that were intense, yet they did not turn into fights. That is a good thing, and I’m grateful for it. That doesn’t mean there isn’t tension. There was one night where Will slept with me and

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