Abuse Hides in the Dark. Turn on Your Light.

Inspiration to Leave Your Abusive Relationship: Liberty or Death?

When it comes to abusive relationships, your freedom or your death may be the only two options you have. Use that to inspire yourself to leave. Read this.

My Thanksgiving weekend would not be complete without remembering our great country and its roots in the ultimate desire for freedom. Of course, I am grateful that almost 240 years ago, brave men and women fought for America’s freedom from the abuse and oppression of the British crown; I am also grateful that I fought for my freedom from abusive oppression in my life.

Before you think I’m stretching it a bit to compare abuse with political matters, I’d like you to consider Patrick Henry’s Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death speech. I hope it moves you to action as Patrick Henry moved the Virginia Congress in 1775.

“Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death” Rewritten for Abuse Sufferers

He tells you, Madam, that you are weak – unable to withstand the pressures of the world alone, unable to circumvent his ultimate power. But when will you be stronger? Will it be the next week or the next year? Will it be when you are totally disarmed and his actions and thoughts take up residence in not only your mind but have strangled your spirit into nonexistence?

Will you gather strength through inaction and compliance? Will you keep the peace until peace cannot be found within you, but only around you as a false front to peering eyes? Shall you gather your will to fight his war by lying down for him, allowing him to trample your heart until it stops beating? Shall you lie there hugging the delusive phantom of hope until he has bound you hand and foot?

Madam, you are not weak, if you make proper use of the powers and means which God has given to you.

Millions of women, armed with the holy cause of freedom from their lovers’ abuses, and in our country where freedom is still unbound, are invincible against any abuse that their lovers can send against them. You, Madam, shall not fight your war alone.

There is hidden help all around you, soul-connected women, men, and a just God who presides over the destiny of those willing to fight abusers who attempt to thwart your ability to follow God’s path for you.

The battle, Madam, is not to the strong alone; it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave. Observe Abuse, your enemy who attacks in many guises. Be ready for Abuse with a plan of action, and bravely set that plan to motion.

Besides, Madam, as it stands, he would give you no voice in the matter; no election of choice. You have desired a voice, and it is now too late to retire from your entreaty. There is no retreat but in submission and slavery! Your chains are forged and borne heavily about your mind! Their clanking can be heard by all those around you! The uprising is inevitable, and let it come! I repeat, Madam, Let It Come!

It is in vain, Madam, to prolong the matter. You may hear yourself cry, Peace, Peace! – but it is but a false peace. The war has actually begun, it is being waged upon you.

There are women already fighting this battle! The next sound you hear will be their resounding statements of “No! I will not suffer this any longer!” Those women are already in the field, praying you will join them.

Why do you stand here idle? What is it that you wish? What would you have instead?

Is your life so dear, or false peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death!

This speech is not my own: many of the phrases are copied from the original speech, too good to alter. Also, for simplicity, I’m speaking about men as abusers and women as abuse sufferers. Please don’t be offended as we are all painfully aware that abuse does not discriminate based on gender.

Clem Onojeghuo