Abuse Hides in the Dark. Turn on Your Light.

Sex and Emotional Abuse

Maybe he does it so he has all the control. Control over me.

My abuser used emotional abuse tied to sex frequently. I don't always know if it was sexual abuse or emotional abuse tied to sex...Today the following entry amazes me. I wrote the truth. I drew the truth. My unconscious mind knew he abused me and I knew I walked a dark path. But I went down it anyway. I didn’t know anything about emotional abuse. I wish someone had told me when I was young.

From 1992 Journal Entry:

“Maybe he just does it to hurt me. Maybe he just wants me scared of him for some reason. Afraid he’ll leave, afraid he’ll hit me again, afraid he’ll call me “whore” again. He wants me totally dependent on him for some reason – so he has control.”


this post is an excerpt from Kellie Jo Holly's book