Category: Staying in Abusive Relationships
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I Lived a Fairy Tale During Domestic Abuse
Once upon a time, I lived in a world of disapproval and fear. I listened to a man who demanded I make him happy, then grew angrier when I could not. I thought something was wrong with me, so I sought to change who I was to become more pleasing to that man. But as I changed…
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Detached from Abuse: This Is Me, That Is Him
I am not naive enough to think this will be easy. It would be nice if some great hand would reach down from the sky to snatch a long-lost relative who left me (and my sister, mother, and grandmas) millions. But as much fun as it is to consider that inane possibility, I do not…
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Why Did I Stay in An Abusive Relationship?
Why did I stay in an abusive relationship for so long? For many reasons that seemed quite rational until after I left the abusive marriage. Here they are.
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Resisting Temptation & Codependency
I just stopped myself from doing something manipulative after seeing a youtube interview with Patricia Evans, author of The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?: A Woman’s Guide to Deciding Whether to Stay or Go. For almost a year and a half now, I’ve tried to prove to my husband that he is, in fact,…
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Seek and Ye Shall Find
Will and I were unhappily married and I once mistakenly blamed him for every one of our missteps and evils. Although I thought I was trying to make him happy, I was really trying to make him happy so he could make me happy. When I failed, I wanted to run far and fast. I…
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Codependency Makes Me Want to Fix Things for Them
My therapist presented an alternative solution, one that actually makes sense and would have cut out all the drama. She said that Marc’s feelings of guilt were HIS to deal with. It sounded harsh to me at first…didn’t I CAUSE Marc’s bad feelings? Wasn’t I responsible for this whole mess anyway? Shouldn’t I do everything…
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Codependency and My Darkness with an Apology at the End
I sent an email to his family revealing this blog. Accidentally. This post is now part of the book “My Abusive Marriage…and what happened when i left it.”
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Domestic Violence Hits Home: I Left Twice
Leaving my abusive marriage happened by surprise, but not unexpectedly. I knew I would leave, but I didn’t have it planned for when it happened.
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The Four Sides to Every Slippery Truth
There are always 3 versions of truth when there is a truth to be told – your version, their version, and the exact record of events imprinted upon the universe. There’s a fourth version of the truth. Find out what they are.
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Grateful That I Reached Out to All of You
For anyone out there who is in an abusive situation, it is time for you to reach out too. It is time to begin remembering that people love you, really love you. And if you can’t think of any, then it is time to find a domestic violence group, book club, a gym, an online…
