Verbal Abuse Incident and Pattern Log
A private place to keep track of what’s happening
**Need this one to look like something else? Get the discreet version instead →
Whether you’re still figuring out what to call it, still living with it, or trying to decide what to do next, the Verbal Abuse Incident and Pattern Log gives you a private, structured way to write down what’s said and done to you, as it happens or as soon after as you can manage. You don’t have to identify as a victim, report anything, or have made any decision to use it.
Written by Kellie Jo Holly Close, who has worked in domestic violence advocacy since founding VerbalAbuseJournals.com in 2008.
What’s Inside
- Quick Capture pages for when you only have thirty seconds and need to get it down before you forget, or before someone’s back in the room.
- Detailed Record pages for when you have more time to write.
- Pattern Review pages to help you see what’s repeating, not just isolated moments.
- A Summary page, built to hand to an advocate, counselor, doctor, or attorney without re-explaining everything from scratch.
The download is 21 pages, cover included, and every one of them is yours to print as often as you need. Run off a stack of Quick Capture sheets and hide them where you can reach them. Print one Detailed Record page at a time if a stack would be noticed. Fill up the Pattern Review pages and print more. You buy it once and the pages never run out. If printing isn’t safe where you are, keep the file on a screen and write your entries in an ordinary notebook.
It’s not a diagnosis and not a legal document. It’s a record that’s yours, in your own words, that you can turn to later when memory alone doesn’t feel like enough.
Purchase “Verbal Abuse Incident and Pattern Log” $9.00
Also Want the Safety Plan Workbook?
The Log tracks what’s happening. The Domestic Violence Safety Plan Workbook helps you plan around it. Buy them together for $19. That’s $3 less than buying them separately.
Privacy and How You’ll Get It
If you need this to look like something else. There’s a second listing that sells the same Log under a recipe title, cover and filename included. See the discreet version →
Getting it. You’ll pay through PayPal and land right back here on a download page with your file ready and waiting.
Your email and statement. Nothing will ever arrive from VerbalAbuseJournals.com. PayPal sends its own confirmation, and your bank or card statement shows “RecJournals” (“Recipe Journals”, if anyone asks).
Refunds and help. These are digital files, so all sales are final. If something goes wrong with your download, email [email protected] or use the contact form, and it’ll get fixed.
A Few Things People Wonder
Do I need to know what to call this yet? No. You don’t have to have decided anything, or even be sure this is “abuse,” to use the Log.
What if I don’t have much time right now? The Quick Capture pages are built for thirty seconds, not thirty minutes. Fill in more later if you want to.
Can I use this if I’m still living with the person? Yes. It was written with that in mind, not just for people who have already left.
Will this hold up if I need it later? It’s not a legal document, but it’s a written record in your own words, close to the time things happened. That’s something an advocate, counselor, or attorney can work with, even if it’s not evidence on its own.