But then there’s the big question: Am I on the path to divorce? Is there NO alternative? Am I going to get divorced in the same hasty manner I married? Did I throw out the brakes on this vehicle without realizing the road was headed downhill?
I find myself wishing Will and I could talk. We both want to be away from each other. We both want the other to change. We both want to renegotiate a LOT of crap. And there I go speaking for him again when there is no way to know what he is thinking. I cannot, by choice and by law, talk to him right now.
I need time.
Because the military now pays attention to domestic violence and abuse, what happens to Will IF he’s convicted of domestic abuse is set in stone: he would be dishonorably discharged if found guilty of domestic abuse charges. That’s what Will says JAG says. I haven’t been able to get to JAG yet – they have a class two times a week and my other appointments have taken priority.
So here I am, being pressured to “not show up” in court and to get financial documents so “we can proceed,” and all I’m really wanting to do is to SIT WITH THIS for a bit.
Instead of blogging, I am going to write out what I want. I’m going to give that to my attorney (for record-keeping) and have her send it to Will. Then maybe he’ll tell me what HE WANTS and I can either be pleased, hurt, or angry, but I would be able to move ahead without feeling unheard and rushed.
Read this entire post and more. Buy My Abusive Marriage . . . and what happened when i left it by Kellie Jo Holly