Category: Domestic Violence Problems

The Good Stuff

“Releasing and healing parental and spousal emotional abuse and sexual abuse will do more for improving your diet and life than just about anything else.” ~from How To Naturally Beat Metabolic Syndrome I believe that statement is true (although I’m not spending money on the diet the site promotes!). As I unwrap layers and years of…
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6-years-old and growing

One part of my plan to end the abuse is in dismanteling his public persona. No, I’m not going to go around town diminishing him as a man or husband. I’m not going to bad-mouth him to friends. I’m not going to be mean and nasty to combat his anger.
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My Support System Is My Foundation

It’s all right that they don’t call ME. The fact that I have benefited and will continue to benefit from their wisdom, education and support is phenomenally important to me. I went from being someone stuck in isolation to being someone who knows who to call and when. More importantly, I learned that my husband’s…
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Happiness Makes Me Trust Him Too Much

It’s late, and I promised myself a more normal schedule, so I’m headed to bed. BUT I also promised myself I’d post daily, so I’m racking my brain for something worthwhile to write. Worthwhile to whom? you may ask. Well, since “you” may or may not be here at all, I guess I’m looking for…
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Waiting for a Hero

I’m feeling so shitty; I want to stop feeling. I want to stop thinking. I want to stop.
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Fake Name True Story

I was off in thought today, considering what my husband, who says he reads this blog, thinks of it. At first he was really pissed off about it and asked me not to use his name or pictures because of military confidentiality concerns. So I blurred his face and changed his name to Will. I thought “Will” was…
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Hungry Angry Lonely Tired = Out of Control

Al-Anon taught me that if I’m Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired, then I am more likely to screw up my emotional well-being. Of course, I was focused on alcoholism at the time, but I think that HALT will apply to my attempts to deal with abuse, too.
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You make me so MAD!!

I know that pausing to take control of my thoughts after he has said or done something “unbelievable,” “horrible,” or “unforgivable” may be extremely difficult. I’ve conditioned myself to skip over my own thoughts and run straight for the gold – the “gold” is my ability to react to him in a way that may…
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I’m Home

I realized that the security I once felt there was imagined. The men I knew there were only parts of their whole. I never realized the things that went on when I wasn’t looking. My protectors were liars and frauds. Is it possible to remember the men I once knew now that I know I…
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Lies and Verbal Abuse

I checked my page on types of verbal abuse and realized that Patricia Evans did not list “LYING” as a type of verbal abuse. For a second, I thought I had discovered a glaring omission in my heroine’s thinking. But it only lasted a second. I realized that lying is not a form of verbal…
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