Abuse Hides in the Dark. Turn on Your Light.

We Forgot to Scream

As I flipped through old journals to create Verbal Abuse Journals, I found a forgotten memory - an instance of physical abuse. How do you forget that?Last night I had a dream. Remember Dachau with rows upon rows of building foundations but no barracks? I remember thinking, “Why did they remove the buildings?” and got the answer, “So they wouldn’t hear the screaming.”

It was very strange until I started wondering what it meant.

What have I removed from my memory so I wouldn’t have to hear the screaming?

It wasn’t until 2009 as I flipped through old journals to create this website that I found a forgotten memory, written and dated as if nothing had happened.

Will physically abused me in 1996. He grabbed my jaw (was he aiming for my throat?) and pushed me around until he had me where he wanted. Of course I couldn’t talk back with my jaw in his hand, so he got his way – me, subservient and quiet. I had forgotten about it altogether until reading my entry.

I removed most of this post because it is part of my book, My Abusive Marriage . . . and what i’m doing in it.