Abuse Hides in the Dark. Turn on Your Light.

Katy’s Story of Abuse

A woman with wide piece of tape over her mouth. She looks angry. Text says 'Break your silence'

Katy’s Signs of Being Abused

I knew I was being abused when I figured out that not every man calls his woman ugly names, or wants their partner to suffer. The name calling started out as a small thing and now its a daily thing…it’s my life.

Katy’s Emotional Signs of Abuse

Heartbroken, Ashamed, Scared

Katy’s Story of Abuse

In June 2008, I was 19 years old. My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me because of some bad decisions that I made in the past. I was devastated and had become depressed. Once I realized he wasn’t coming back I was looking for someone to fill the void in my life.

He says if I leave he will fight for custody of our daughter & will get her since he has a job. He does nothing for her now, why would he take her from me?I met my abusive boyfriend online, he lived right around the corner from me. He had also just gotten out of a long relationship and I’m assuming was looking for the same thing I was.

We met, and before I had even known him for a week, I had already moved in.

We got along pretty good, he didn’t abuse me or call me names. I soon found out that we didn’t have much in common. He liked partying, drinking occasionally, and smoking weed. Things that I had NEVER done.

In March 2009, I found out that I was pregnant. He was upset and said that he never wanted kids. He told his family that it was my fault that we were expecting.

A few days after I found out I was pregnant, we were standing in our kitchen and he was holding onto me very tight (can’t remember why) and it was starting to hurt so I tried pushing him off of me. He said I “hurt his ear” and then he pushed me very hard and caused my back to hit the counter and my head kept going back until it hit the shelving on the wall.

A million things started going through my head at that moment like what have I gotten myself into? I then fell to the ground just laying there crying saying I want to go home. He got a knife out and told me that I wasn’t leaving.

I had a big knot on the back of my head and since his mom is an RN he drove me to her house but made me lie about the whole situation saying that I hit it some different kind of way.

In November 2009, we had a beautiful baby girl. He took very good care of me while we were in the hospital, I thought wow, he has changed. The change didn’t last long…He doesn’t care for our daughter, he says if she died then oh well, that is just life.

How could he feel that way about her, if she died, I would feel as if I couldn’t go on in life. She is my everything.

He changed one diaper in the hospital and that was it. She just turned two years old, has never fed her, given her a bath, or even changed her clothes.

He also calls her names, I keep thinking maybe he will change when she gets older. He calls me names every single day.

He breaks my daughters toys that my family has bought for her. Last week he picked up her cozy coupe car that she got last Christmas and started slamming it into the ground until the wheels were smashed.

He hit our light fixture in our bedroom with it and glass went every where. I just remember seeing our daughter standing in our doorway crying.

I threaten to leave and he says I’ll just kill your whole family so that you have nothing. He tells me that I’m too dumb to make it in the real world on my own and that I could never hold a steady job. He also says if I leave he will fight for custody of our daughter and the judge will give her to him since he has a job. He does nothing for her now, why would he take her from me?

She loves him though, she loves when he comes home from work and has to kiss him before he leaves everyday. He doesn’t ask me to do anything though, I just stay home all day. He doesn’t want me to cook for him or clean or do anything. I just finished up with college last month, I got a degree in Medical Office Technology.

Surely I could get a job and make it on my own…Maybe I am crazy and everything is my fault. I don’t know, I just hope I can figure things out soon.

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