Robbin’s Signs of Being Abused
No one thing….It sort of dawned on me that something was not right when bringing up something on my mind, (wanting to go see my son in CA, who I had not seen in 3 years) caused me such stress and anxiety that I prayed and even fasted lunch for weeks before even BRINGING IT UP. This after 24 years of marriage.
Robbin’s Emotional Signs of Abuse
Shame, Guilt, Fear
Robbin’s Story of Abuse
Thank God for this website. I have believed that I was crazy for years. Crazy for not “allowing him to love me”, not being grateful for his love and care. I hope we can submit more than one experience, I have had so many. I DO HOPE this helps someone else.
I will relate a few episodes:
I wanted to go see my son in California. I had not seen him in 3 years. I prayed for days before I brought it up. The only time he had off of work was the days after Christmas. I VERY nervously brought it up to my husband.
Reaction: “How can you be so selfish and self-centered??? I can’t believe you are so inconsiderate to ask to go over MY vacation!”
Then he yelled, “Selfish Pig! Now go pray about THAT, BITCH!”
Once he had a short fling with a co-worker. He told me about it on Christmas night when he was very drunk. He said, “She was the best piece of ass I ever had, and it was so hard to come home to you after that.”
Once I lost my purse at work. I think it was stolen. He had to pick me up from work and it made him so mad that he didn’t talk to me for 4 days. When he did talk, he growled, “I hate stupidity.”
I have heard:
- “Gutter trash. I took you out of the gutter, I can put you back.“
- “I’ll have my pussy. I’ll go out and get it if you don’t have sex with me. (we were dating then)
- “I don’t want your daughter. I want Clay, (my son), but Lynnette has to stay with your mom.”
- “If you ever got raped, that’s a deal breaker. I couldn’t live with you then.“
- About my gynecologist: “There’s something wrong with a man that wants to be a pussy doctor.”
Here’s our marriage: no insult, put down, ugliness, no filthy name, no threat, should have any impact or take any toll on my emotions or make me unhappy in the long term. If it does, I am a crazy bitch.
So much more floods my mind. It is HARD to do but I am seeking my way out of this so I can rediscover who I am after 25 years. All the excuses I have used in the past for not leaving seem so small now. I don’t care about them now.