No Call, No Worry
HOPEFULLY on this coming Wednesday, I’ll have my computer back.
In the meantime, I’ve nothing to say.
Well, except for that my husband requested that we schedule a time for him to call. I did, and then I waited…and waited…and waited. No call. No surprise.
I’m not waiting anymore. If there’s something I want to do even if he’s scheduled to call, I’m going to do it.
To be fair, he is far far away and has responsibilities that do indeed “come up” out of the blue.
But how long does it take to send an email? A little note the a day after the missed appointment would have gone a long way and I would have thought it very considerate. But I didn’t hear from him for six days.
He left a message saying he’d call this Monday night. We’ll see…but if I find something else to do, I won’t be waiting by my phone!
In fact, I won’t be waiting by my phone even if I have nothing else to do. My thoughts are pretty cool when they’re not wrapped up tightly around what he might do!
I’m starting to value what I think in part because I’m surrounded by women whom I admire and who are telling me that they appreciate me, too! (Never underestimate the power of a heartfelt thank you. Give them often. Simple “thank-yous” are saving me.)
So far as my husband’s inconsiderate behavior goes, I have only his past record to judge by, and I feel that a part of him felt pretty powerful knowing that I was waiting for him to call…. Not only was I waiting, but I had told the kids to get ready to talk to Dad, so we were all waiting.
He’ll tell me that I’m way off base or “I can see how you could feel that way, but…” when I tell him how I feel; maybe I won’t tell him anything at all.
Now don’t think I’ve been stewing over this, missing appointments, refusing to live my life while I thought this over and over! I didn’t, and I haven’t.
In fact, I’ve been to more than 4 meetings for and of The Woman’s Club and I’m heading and co-chairing two committees. I’ve also been doing some print design for the club on top of taking the minutes (they elected me recording secretary for this year).
In addition, I attended the rally in Washington, D.C. on Saturday. (It was awesome and I was SO happy that I went!)
I guess it just goes to show that my relationship’s HISTORY is going to be a challenge to overcome. I want to learn when to confront my husband on his behavior, and when to “let it go” and not give him the (assumed) satisfaction of knowing his controlling methods worked.
The challenge for me is to decide when I truly “need” to confront him on something and when it is better to let my silence do the talking.
It’s always harder for me to be quiet. I tend to want to let him know exactly how I feel in an effort to “punish” him for not doing what I wanted him to do.
But where did I get the idea that sharing my thoughts and feelings was punishment for someone else?
Possibly Related Posts:
- Don’t Worry
- I Am Hoping
- Thank You
- Between You and Me
- Don’t worry…it could just be borderline personality disorder…
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