Comments on: Bang http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/2009/03/25/bang/ ...and what I'm doing in it Sat, 12 May 2012 04:16:57 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= By: Me http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/2009/03/25/bang/comment-page-1/#comment-284 Me Sun, 12 Jul 2009 16:55:18 +0000 http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/?p=107#comment-284 hee hee...you were commenting on my blog as I was commenting on <a href="http://randomlykassiopeia.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">yours</a>! hee hee…you were commenting on my blog as I was commenting on yours!

]]> By: Randomly K http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/2009/03/25/bang/comment-page-1/#comment-283 Randomly K Sun, 12 Jul 2009 14:08:20 +0000 http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/?p=107#comment-283 "He’s going to hit you again, and he’s going to continually waste your time – waste your life. What’s keeping you there?" Wow! The word PROFOUND comes to mind. With all the thoughts I've had go through my head while trying to think this through for myself...I never thought of it that way...wasting MY time, MY life... Good stuff to think about!! “He’s going to hit you again, and he’s going to continually waste your time – waste your life. What’s keeping you there?”

Wow! The word PROFOUND comes to mind. With all the thoughts I’ve had go through my head while trying to think this through for myself…I never thought of it that way…wasting MY time, MY life… Good stuff to think about!!

]]> By: Me http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/2009/03/25/bang/comment-page-1/#comment-282 Me Sun, 12 Jul 2009 13:30:10 +0000 http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/?p=107#comment-282 Your thoughts remind me of many wasted days and sleepless nights "talking it through" with my husband. I know that your "10 hour" comment is factual - some people wouldn't believe that a conversation concerning oh, say "Why You Incompetently Manage Money" could last so long OR be taken so seriously. What they don't understand is that sitting there and taking it silently is what the abuser expects and wants. The more we defend, justify or protest, the longer the "conversation" continues. And about the physical violence, I've experienced it three times in my marriage. Although my husband hasn't threatened that type of abuse verbally, I carry the undercurrent thought "will he hit me?" within myself. Anne, why are you with your guy? Is it possible to leave? Do you want to leave? He's going to hit you again, and he's going to continually waste your time - waste your life. What's keeping you there? Your thoughts remind me of many wasted days and sleepless nights “talking it through” with my husband. I know that your “10 hour” comment is factual – some people wouldn’t believe that a conversation concerning oh, say “Why You Incompetently Manage Money” could last so long OR be taken so seriously. What they don’t understand is that sitting there and taking it silently is what the abuser expects and wants. The more we defend, justify or protest, the longer the “conversation” continues.

And about the physical violence, I’ve experienced it three times in my marriage. Although my husband hasn’t threatened that type of abuse verbally, I carry the undercurrent thought “will he hit me?” within myself.

Anne, why are you with your guy? Is it possible to leave? Do you want to leave? He’s going to hit you again, and he’s going to continually waste your time – waste your life. What’s keeping you there?

]]> By: Anne http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/2009/03/25/bang/comment-page-1/#comment-243 Anne Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:51:45 +0000 http://verbalabusejournals.com/verbal-abuse-marriage/?p=107#comment-243 I hate "calming the beast" when you finally go to bed after HOURS of going over the same LITTLE thing again and again for hours, what if he hits you in the back when you turn on your side. "Explain yourself" ummmmmm I have no idea what the offense was that I committed. So then I get to spend hours apologizing for something imaginary, and trying to calm him down. Bang. Finally someone who understands the torment. He used to hit, and threatens to do it again all the time. People dont realize that verbal can at times be just as bad, at least the physical wouldn't go on for 10 hours. I hate “calming the beast” when you finally go to bed after HOURS of going over the same LITTLE thing again and again for hours, what if he hits you in the back when you turn on your side. “Explain yourself” ummmmmm I have no idea what the offense was that I committed. So then I get to spend hours apologizing for something imaginary, and trying to calm him down. Bang. Finally someone who understands the torment. He used to hit, and threatens to do it again all the time. People dont realize that verbal can at times be just as bad, at least the physical wouldn’t go on for 10 hours.

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