Kendall’s Signs of Being Abused
Through talking about my experience with my mom and a close friend.
Kendall’s Emotional Signs of Abuse
Depression, Insecurity, Regret
Kendall’s Story of Abuse
It’s still hard for me to come to terms with the fact that I was actually in an abusive relationship. I always thought I was a stronger person than that. It wasn’t until I’d talked about my relationship with my mom and a close friend that they told me what was happening.
I’d been with this guy for over a year and I’m left only a shadow of my former self. I’ve lost my self-confidence and who I am. I have to start over and pick up the pieces and try to move on.
Looking back, the only way to describe how it started was that it seemed like he was testing the waters early on to see what he could get away with. At first it was just a hurtful joke about my body followed by a comment like “I’m just concerned that you’d let yourself go if we got married.”
He was extremely hypocritical. For example, he would respond jealously and suspiciously if I ever talked to another guy, while he had multiple close female friends. Some of whom he’d admitted to having feelings for and actually dated in the past.
He would say that I was being creepy and a stalker when I would add MUTUAL female friends on facebook. He would always find reasons to call me a liar or prove that I was untrustworthy. I often felt like he would purposely trap me and find insignificant details in my story to prove that I was trying to hide something.
He would always point out when there was an attractive girl in a movie or in public when we were together and make me feel unattractive and insecure.
Every time we broke up was because he made it seem like it was my fault, or there was somethingwrong with me, only because he knew I would apologize (whether I’d actually done anything wrong or not) and beg him to take me back and give me another chance. In fact, the last conversation we had, he called me a “habitual liar”, “creepy”, and said that I needed “serious help, and a therapist.”
Whenever he would say that I’d lied to him he would always say “Figure it out. If you don’t know what you did, you obviously don’t know me at all.”
I never knew how he really felt about me, and I was insecure for the entire relationship.