Types of verbal abuse range from full on anger to forgetting on purpose. Even the silent treatment is a type of verbal abuse! Verbal abusers use several other sneaky tactics to abuse and control their victims, too. Recognizing the types of verbal abuse is the first step to overcoming its effects and regaining your mental health.
Therefore, I am finding that I am an emotional chameleon. I must learn to turn off my emotions and the thought train they trigger when I recognize abuse to protect myself and begin “observation mode”. This is not going to work for the long haul. I do not want to live my life connecting and disconnecting from the one I married. But for now and until I leave or he knocks off the abuse, it will have to work.
I feel that responding to countering only continues the likelihood that my husband will find other ways to abuse my thoughts and feelings. It feels like he wants me to stand there and accept his irrationality as reality. I’ve tried to understand and accept his irrationality for almost two decades. Because I’ve done that for so long, I am afraid that he will succeed in drawing me back into his warped world.