March 19, 2003
I have these voices in my head.
The other voice says, “You’re being too hard on yourself – the kid in you needs some love. The woman in you needs some love. Love yourself.”One says, “GROW UP! You’re not a child anymore! Stop expecting someone else to fill your cup and take care of things yourself!”
Love love love. Wish wash. How do I love myself AND do my job, too? Sometimes I feel like I need someone else to love me FOR me. I don’t know HOW to love myself.
Discipline? How do I get that? A loving, guiding voice? Where does that come from?
How do I be my own mother and father AND be a mom and dad for Marc and Eddie?
There doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day. I don’t even know what I need.
Read My Abusive Marriage…and what i’m doing in it…you’ll think I married your husband.